Ask and Ye Shall Recieve

Through a great deal of boredom I began looking at facebook (never a good sign really) and I just recognized (I'm freaking a lot slow) how Heavenly Father answers my prayers. In a way that is completely beyond my imagination.

I was reading old notes between a friend and I on facebook. They weren't terribly old (from like...the end of March.) I talked about needing patience--I have always failed at that subject. And how I just needed to have patience because at the time I didn't really know where my life was going. I knew I wanted one (or more) of the 3 M's (Mission, Masters, Marriage). I was hoping for the mission to give me purpose but didn't feel it was right. I figured that for most masters degrees I wouldn't be able to get in until Fall of 2011. Marriage, I was still mooning over my ex-missionary. And I'm not a huge social person to go out and date all the time. I told my friend that instead I was left with 2 W's, 2 P's, and an F (Work, Wait, Patience, Prayer and Faith) I honestly didn't know what my next step was. I just though I knew what it wasn't. Surprise surprise. Heavenly Father does things on His terms in His time. And really, my life generally turns out better that I was originally planning on.

I'm starting a Masters program. Which is insane! I'm a 20 year old graduate student. Yeah, I'm a little conceited I guess, since I get all excited over that. I also scares me. I feel so young, maybe I don't have the life experience. I am going into Marriage and Family Therapy--several people have told me that since I'm not married and I'm younger I won't have a clientele base. I have been blessed with wonderful family and amazing friends who support me. I have decided: A therapist does not need to be a schizophrenic to treat someone with schizophrenia. A doctor does not need to have had lupus to treat a patient with lupus. While being married and having a family are things I eventually hope to have--and hopefully even before I receive my degree--they are not prerequisites for being a good M/F Therapist.

And even more crazily is the fact that Eric and I are dating. Please note that marriage is NOT part of the equation for now. It's insane as it is. It's only been a week (in which he has been gone for) but it makes me happy. And I am very blessed to have the family and support system I do. To go with me. Not to point out "I told you so's" My life is wonderful. I am so blessed with it all. I have an excellent job, great co-workers, a crazy dog, my own apartment (in which I have been blessed with everything concerning furnishing), a boyfriend, and in 2 weeks I will be starting school again. I have excellent friends. My 2 best friends are most likely getting married this summer. And even through that they still have time for me. Because they are awesome.

Basically though what I'm trying to say is that I've been very blessed. A month ago I didn't know where my life was going and I was convinced that I was miserable because of that. Now I realize even having a structure in my life I don't always know where I am going. But I'm going to enjoy the ride. And remember that things do sometimes turn out the way I'd like...they just generally don't work out that way right off. :D

If…
If you could become an expert in any subject or activity it would be emotions, especially in regards to body language.
If you could have dinner with anyone currently alive, it would be Hmm...my boyfriend. Which is silly. Because that one will come true. But it also makes it apparant that I'm missing him.
If you could meet any fictional character it would be Percy Blakeney, except he's in love with Marguerite. Zooks!
If you could change one thing about your present life It would be not be snowing. And I would be more moneywise.
If you could live anywhere you wanted, I would live Maybe in my own house, but I'd still like to be in my small town.
If you could go back in time and change one things from your past, I would change My ingratitude especially towards my parents.
If I had superpowers I would have wings and would fly up to the clouds. I just think wings look cool.
If I became a millionaire overnight, I would pay for my college education, my own place, and then pretend to be a good investor.
If I could choose any year to have been born I would have chosen the year AD 33 in America because being someone around for 3 Nephi would completely be marvelous.
If I were a born as an animal, I would have chosen to be a tiger or a monkey because tigers are the ultimate feline. Ferocious and gorgeous. Monkeys still have opposable thumbs.
If I could live a day without consequences I would kiss a stranger. Ask stupid questions. Paint my apartment.
If a genie granted me three wishes I would wish for joy. A house. Money to get me through all the schooling I desire.
If I knew I could not fail for one day I would go take the EMT certification. Approach an enemy about forgiveness.

This thing made me happy for my life.

Run ins, Make Ups, Dating, Houses and School

Well, I have been planning to post but everytime I thought about it I either didn't have anything going on or I couldn't think of how to post things. However I have been informed that I need to post details of recent events on my blog. So I have no idea where to begin but begin I will. It all starts out with moving.

I found a small home for rent. They allowed a puppy. And I was--still am--stoked. All of it fell into place marvelously. So I began moving in the first week in April. It was conference weekend so my old roommate came down for a night to help me clean it (see how blessed I am--seriously what friend comes and helps clean!) While she was here we took a walmart run for supplies and dropped my Mum off at a nail apartment at Eric's (my ex-missionary) house with his sister. Normally I came along. But due to the circumstances (him being home and me needing to shop) I figured all would be good. His sister called and asked me to come back and see her though. And plus I needed to see her new baby. I figured that the way she was talking that he wasn't going to be home. So when I got there I just went in.

The first thing I saw was him. But it was too late to turn back and I really wanted us to at least be friends. As cheesy as it sounds I found over the time that I wanted him in my life, in whatever role I could get him. Yeah, I really am a pathetic moron. So I was really surprised that he hugged me and asked me how things were going. It was a little awkward but not in the way I was expecting it to be. In fact running into him was a relief. We talked for a little bit and then he had to leave. As soon as he was gone his Mom stressed to me that they didn't set me up and didn't know whether he'd be there. I was disappointed to find out that he didn't see me at all during his homecoming. Grr...I looked freaking great for that! My hair was curled, my dress awesome, and makeup looked great. When do I see him? When I'm in the process of moving and cleaning. My hair was pulled back into a ponytail and bare minimum on the whole makeup process. Yeah not my worst, I looked alright but I had wanted to look my best.

Later that day he texted me and asked if he could help me move. A little stumped, he was the one who broke my heart, I complied. It ended up being a good thing. My dad was sick, one of my little brothers (the one who can move stuff) ditched me and my friend left. My mom, my other little brother and I were not necessarily strong enough to move it all. And it was good, in a weird kind of way, to see him. I was surprised at how easy it was to be around him. How wasted the last 6 months dedicated to moving on had been. But I was determined. We were going to be friends and nothing more but I would do all that I could to be his friend.

The next week was pretty normal, he and I would text every once in a while but really nothing too big or drastic. He did come to a movie night with my friend and her fiance at my home to celebrate moving in. I was busy moving in and getting things situated and figuring out what more I needed with my home. Eric and I would text but I tried to be cautious. I know my emotions. I still cared for him a lot more than I wanted to. I wanted to be friends but I didn't want to be hurt again.

Last week was kind of insane. A coworker mentioned that he was getting his masters degree and still able to work full time. He told me about the school and suggested I look into it. So I requested information. The next day they called me. The day after I spoke with an admissions counselor and if all goes well this week I could be starting my Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy in May. So in like, a month! It feels crazy. I've been debating over a masters but still figured that it would take at least 6 months to get anything really started. This is going speedy gonzalez fast. Which seems to be my whole life right now.

This week has been the kicker, well and last week got everything into motion. I asked Eric to help me move a couch and a bed into my apartment (YAY I have a couch and a bed!) we ended up talking about more serious stuff, still not mentioning anything deep or personal. But it started getting there. He came over Sunday and helped me make cookies. Things had been said that made me wonder about his feelings. And this week he is leaving for Europe for 3 weeks. So we really talked. Basically he still has feelings for me and then he talked about why he sent me the letter and how he felt towards me during his mission. I told him how he'd made me feel. How he'd hurt me. We decided on being friends and just seeing how things go. I figured he wasn't ready for a relationship and I still wasn't sure where I sat with everything else. After he left he texted me saying he had other things to tell me. So we decided to go out Monday.

Monday jumped the gun. We talked even more and in the end he kissed me. He commented after that that he would have to tell his mom he was in a relationship. I told him we weren't unless he wanted it. He wasn't sure what he wanted. Once again, he left with me figuring that we were just friends. Me not sure how I was feeling with things. Yesterday he texted me that he wanted to date me. I needed to think about it and talk to him. We texted a lot with me getting frustrated more and more--I really can be such a wench. I told him he needed to ask me and NOT over text. He could still tell that I was upset and started to try to cheer me up. Then he came over and asked me to date him. I told him no. (seriously, but there was more to it than that) we talked things over. Compromised. And now we're dating.

There's the facts. It seems so cold, so fast and so detached. The feelings there though are beyond description. Part of me thinks this is crazy. I should have made him work harder to get me. And wonders if this is too fast. If really things are rushed and if this is really what he wants? I am so worried and so insecure. And yet through it all, he makes me happy--happier than anybody else ever has. And things feel right. We talk. About everything. I have no problem being honest with him. Telling him that he hurt me. Letting him know if something makes me angry or happy. And really that makes it worth it to me. I've been telling everyone that I have forgiven him. That love is always worth the risk. It would be hypocritical of me to forget that now.

So crazily, happily, I am dating a guy I swore up and down wanted nothing to do with me. A guy who has already broken my heart. And could very well break it again. This is something I've been trying my hardest not to dream about for the past 6 months. That I vowed would not happen because it only happened in romance novels. People who broke up and hurt each other the way we have to each other do not forgive and forget. But they do. The movie "He's Just Not That Into You" seems to be my inspiration lately. I have spent the last 6 months saying that I am the rule. Not the exception. But right now, we are the exception. We are the proof that romance novel scenes, as cheesy and corny as they are, are loved because it's the most amazing experience when it happens to you. Actually, cheesy romance scenes are there because it's what we all wished happened. But because it so seldom does it means I cherish it even more.

And there are so many unknowns. But I really am excited for it. Life really isn't what I'm expecting. It never is. But it's an adventure all the same.

Triple Dose

I've been slacking. Seriously bad. My excuse is that I wanted to post pictures of Disneyland but I never get on my blog when I'm on the computer that has my pictures. So maybe next time. For now I'm going to put on here the events of my life.

Disneyland was amazing. I got to spend 5 days with 2 of my favorite people in the world. Away from the drama that I make for myself and just reality really. Disneyland was heaven and joy--mostly because of the people I was with. I will say though that my feet hurt so bad! After three days of zipping around Disneyland and California Adventure I guess it's to be expected.
The second day at Disneyland it rained. But was okay because we have excellent timing and went to eat at the Rainforest Cafe. That was actually a lot of fun. Crazy and not something I would normally do. But really, that was part of the fun. Hmm...I'm trying to think of all the amazingness without going onto every ride we did. Screamin' is ultimately my favorite ride. Poor Toni probably hated me by the end of the trip cause I kept dragging us all back to it.

It attempted rain the last two days at Disneyland but really that was okay because it kept the park less busy. Our last day Toni convinced us to do the Grizzly Bear Rapids and Splash Mountain despite the incumbent weather and I am really glad we did. For one we got fabulous ponchos--I don't think I managed to get a picture. And I'd never been on the Grizzly Rapids--and I always enjoy Splash Mountain. All of it was great though.

Our ride home was fraught with adventure and danger as well. (Okay, I'm being a little dramatic) BUT we did get lost--in industrial L.A. area. It was pretty freaking scary. Seriously it was probably around 9:30 in the morning and even still I locked the doors. Toni was getting sick and I was a jerk and wouldn't even let her out for that. The poor girl, it really seems like I beat up on her a lot that trip. But we did make it home safely and securely and so everything worked out well.

I got sick the day after we got home so that put me out of the game for a couple of days as well. The last couple of weeks I have basically just worked and had my EMT class. And house searching. In which, I must air to all. I was successful. It's great. I'm very excited to move out and to be able to have something my own. I just feel more adult that way. ^ ^ It's a small 2 bedroom modular in the same town but still just away. I also bought a table and chairs for it. I have a marvelous friend who is going to give me her couch and I'll just piece everything together slowly. It's wonderful. I am so blessed with it all.

So that's the news in my life. I will move out conference/easter weekend and hope that all goes well.
Oh and for the heck of it here's my random blogging fun. A triple dose.

Threes

Three things you can’t go without.
-Family
-Scriptures
-Love/Romance
Three celebrity crushes.
-Shia Le Beouf
-Taylor Lautner (even if he is younger)
-Vin Diesel
Three favorite book characters.
-Percy Blakeney (Scarlet Pimpernel)
-Ginny (Only Alien On the Planet)
-Thatcher Wood (Quandaries of a Quirky Romantic—not technically a book, but I’m counting.)
Three favorite things to wear.
-Feminine Blouses
-Green hi-tops
-Super cute jeans (How Valley Girl do I sound saying that)
Three things you want in a relationship.
-Someone I can trust and love
-Someone I can talk with and often to
-Someone who will cuddle me
-(And because three just doesn’t cut it) who has the same faith as I do.
Three pet peeves.
-People who won’t take responsibility for their actions.
-People who have decided they know exactly how I should be living my life—and then proceeding to tell me about it.
-People who disregard your emotions because “it was only to be expected”
Three things you’d do if you weren’t so afraid.
-Ask more questions.
-Talk to people.
-Kiss a stranger.
Three favorite TV shows
-Big Bang Theory
-Bones
-House
Three Things You Want
-A Bed
-A T.V.
-Faith

Today Is a Gift…That is Why it is Called the Present

So quick update on life. This weekend was ‘His’ homecoming. And it went. He looks good, he sounds great. And it sort of broke my heart to realize that I haven’t made the progress I was hoping to. It’s hard to realize that he really does not want me involved in his life. That he’s going to date, and grow and change and doesn’t want any of that to involve me. I felt almost like I was taking 3 steps back and I’d only taken 2 steps forward. But I’m very grateful that I went. That I won’t have that as a regret. That’s really been the biggest influence in my life lately.
Also on Saturday I spent the entire day with EMT training. It was actually, rather enjoyable. Crazy though. I enjoyed my group. We will definitely be close by the end of class with all the touching and moving we all do. But really, that’s a good thing. And I’m grateful I don’t have personal space issues.

Today Is a Gift…That is Why it is Called the Present

What is the dominant emotions in your life right now?
Anxiety and confusion. Mixed with gratitude and happiness. I sound so ungrateful when I say that I am so confused in my life right now. However, I really have a lot of insecurities and the return of Eric has not really helped them out. In fact probably made them worse. It’s hard because everyone goes on about how he is so great, and still the same kid, etc. etc. and so forth. And it makes me wonder. What makes me so different? How come he can treat everyone else the same but he can’t even keep contact with me? It’s especially hard since I am still in love with the kid—because I’m a masochist. >.<

Who made you feel good this week?
My boss has. He gave me an amazing compliment and let me know that they’re grateful for me to be working here. Larry, from the Radio did as well, by telling my coworker that I brought a cute personality with me to the job announcement. Even if I disagree with him—there is a reason I never wanted to be a Radio personality—he still made me feel good. Most of the boys from my EMT class. They spent half of Saturday telling that they had not problem with me bandaging them or getting up close and personal. My Mom and My other self because they continue to tell me that I am doing good. Even though they are the ones who see me at my weakest the most.

What was the biggest mistake you made this week?
Letting other people get to me. Being acted upon rather than standing alone. So basically being subject to my hormones and emotions—and consequently taking them out on someone else.

What’s the funniest thing that happened to you this week?
Sad to say, I'm really not so sure. I think it was pretty freaking funny when I was doing Patient Assessments on Zachary and he kept making up things and changing them. But now that I reflect, actually the funniest moment this last week is when my puppy Giselle ran into a chair at top speed. Really it shouldn't have been so funny, but I'm a horrible owner and laughed hysterically, seeing this fuzzy poofball running as fast as she could and not watching where she was going. I was told I did that a lot as a little girl.

What are you looking forward to the most?
Disneyland! My chance to escape with two of my favorite people EVER! And to pretend that all my other worries don’t exist.

What makes you the happiest today?
Probably the fact that I’m going to the temple today. It’s just going to be AWESOME!

What is something you want to accomplish this week?

I want to get my car serviced. And also get my EMT homework complete. Pass my test for EMT. And enjoy myself at Disneyland. I also am hoping to be more charitable and less concerned about what others think or expect of me.

Life as I know It

Life as I Know It
Well, I am very grateful for my life. Things haven’t been bad so far. I am a moron and feel a lot of anxiety and I think that I will until Sunday when I go to “The Homecoming” Okay, so really it shouldn’t be a big enough deal to put capital letters on but I will be ready to get it over with this At least that's what I keep telling myself. I hate all of this. I hate that I’m still basing things on it. I really am as pathetic as I feel. *sigh* But lets not dwell on my insecurites and how pathetic I am.
But my EMT class is going smashingly. It makes me extremely busy but really that can only be a good thing. I’m learning a lot and getting to see a lot of really gross pictures. It also reminds me that I’m very grateful to have chosen the career I did. I really had wanted something in the medical field but I can see that I wouldn’t have enjoyed it the way I do working with people now. But it’s good knowledge and I think that I’ll enjoy volunteering for the ambulance. So in many ways I get the best of both worlds. On Saturday we’re having class all day and we’re learning how to triage—which is sorting people in mass casualties and how to extricate people from vehicles. That will be pretty cool. Not to mention the bandaging and to splint. Things like bulging eyeballs and such. Yeah, it’s pretty great.
Then I’m going to Disneyland in a week. I am so excited. I seriously have some of the most amazing people in my life. We will be leaving on Thursday and will have 3 glorious days in California. With Disney surrounding us. And sun. Woo hoo. I can honestly say that this will be relieving. I hope that it's not pathetic. ^ ^ And that's mostly my life. It's great. I'm very blessed. Even when I don't recognize it. It's hard to feel sorry for yourself when you realize you're blessings.
And I’m still on my hey-random-blogging-things-of-no-importance kick. So, here are various favorites.

Favorites
My favorite colors are GREEN & PURPLE! Because they are just so fun and bright and happy. When I wear them I feel like I can brighten the world.
My favorite place in the whole world is the temple, especially the Manti Temple. It is where I go anytime that I have worries or struggles. Where I’m most happy and where I find the most peace. I’m so lucky that it is so close.
My favorite dream was being content. Where I just drifting off, sort of floating around. I don’t know why but it always makes me feel content.
My favorite food is whatever is going into my mouth at the time, mostly. With the exception of mushrooms, octopus, and brussel sprouts I’m generally good.
My Favorite flavor of ice cream is Half BakedÒ. Seriously, this stuff is more than ice cream it’s like a way of life. A girl’s best friend. You don’t just have ice cream but you also have chunks of brownies, globs of cookie dough
My favorite type of music is musicals. What can I say? I live for corn and cheese.
What was your favorite subject in school? Drama. Or human biology.
Who was your favorite teacher? Hm… In Elementary Mr. Blauer. In Jr. High Mrs. Chamberlain. In High School Mrs. Liddell or Mr. Eastman. And in College probably Steve. Or Jen. Overall—probably Steve.
What was your favorite cartoon? That’s got to be a mix between X-men Evolution and Gargoyles.
As a child, who was your favorite relative? Hm, my Grandpa McArthur. He was wonderful. I loved spending time with him. *Sigh* I really miss him.
My favorite outfit right now is probably cute jeans, a frilly top and flats. Comfy yet cute.
My favorite book is Scarlet Pimpernel right now. Yeah, that’s a good one.
My favorite comedian is Brian Regan.
My favorite animal is a dog. Mostly because of my puppy.
My favorite movie is The Blind Side.
My favorite activity is reading a book.
My favorite candy bar is Twix.
And that's really all the favorites I can think of.

2301 Things in lists of 10

My life has been sort of dull lately. Mostly revolving around my EMT class, my puppy, trying to avoid the thought of D-Day and spending a lot of time with my family. But I still wanted to post things and wanted something interesting (or fun)--at least to me. So I found some lists. Here of the Lists of 10.

10 things that make me happy are...
1. Half-Baked ice cream
2. Helping people
3. The gospel
4. My dog
5. Romantic comedies
6. Silly putty
7. Family & friends
8. Green and purple
9. Silly memories
10. Road trips

10 things that I value about life are...
1. Life
2. Food
3. The gospel
4. My family
5. Love
6. Faith
7. Truth
8. Hard-work
9. The ability to feel
10. Good company

10 things that I believe in are...
1. God
2. The LDS Church
3. True Love
4. World Peace
5. Evil
6. Family
7. Temple Marriage
8. Karma
9. Friendship
10. The value of hard work

11 lessons that I have learned so far in my life are...
1. Not everything ends in happily ever after
2. Hard work pays off.
3. Good decisions make a good life.
4. Love will always be worth the pain you risk—even if the pain is what you end up with.
5. You must risk to get gain.
6. Family and friends help shape us into who you are..
7. Nothing is ever easy nor is it ever free.
8. Bad things happen to good people.
9. God has the answer to everything. Science just asks questions.
10. It’s easier to be rude and angry but you’re more successful it you can always find something good about a person
11. All too often one gets EXACTLY what they ask for but its seldom what we really want

10 things that make me laugh...
1. Disney Movies
2. Lame jokes
3. Dogs chasing their tails
4. Toddlers
5. Polk-a-dots
6. The Far Side
7. Quotes
8. Off the Wall comments
9. Old memories
10. Friends

10 things that make me cry are...
1. Patriotic themes
2. Heartbreak
3. Lost ones memories
4. Touching stories
5. Happy endings
6. Periods
7. Getting angry
8. Being Happy
9. Being Sad
10. Basically any extreme emotion

10 places that I would like to visit are...
1. The Temple
2. Las Vegas Temple
3. Rome
4. Italy
5. East Coast
6. Greece
7. Nauvoo
8. Church History
9. Disney World
10. Egypt

10 Things that Stress me out are...
1. Basically Failure
2. Not having enough to do.
3. Not understanding
4. Panic attacks
5. Deadlines
6. Procrastination
7. Not helping people
8. School work
9. Not getting enough sleep
10. Not taking care of myself

10 people that I would love to meet are...
If only alive people then:
1. President Monson
2. President Uctdorf
3. Paul Ekman
4. Dan Brown
5. my future spouse (freaking get here already!)
6. Diane Ackerman
7. Elder Gerald N. Lund
8. Sister Sherri Dew
9. Doris Day
10. President Holland
If alive or dead:
1. Joseph Smith
2. President Monson
3. Emma Smith
4. Abraham Lincoln
5. George Washington
6. Emily Bronte
7. WWII American Soldier
8. Grandma McArthur
9. Grandma Roberts
10. Killick Roberts

10 things that I would like to carry with me at all times are...
1. Chap stick
2. Chocolate
3. Face mask
4. Makeup kit
5. Book of Mormon
6. Pen & paper
7. Book
8. Identification
9. Camera
10. Lighter

10 expectations that I have of myself are...
1. To get a masters degree
2. To continuously work on bettering myself
3. To be successful in a career that I enjoy
4. To be a wife
5. To be a mother
6. To run a 5K again
7. To bike a 50 miler
8. To compete in a triathalon
9. To continuously be active in the Gospel
10. To constantly learn and gain knowledge

10 things that I do well are...
1. Learn
2. Help others
3. Maintain friendships
4. Dramatize things
5. Cook
6. Write
7. Run
8. Listen actively
9. Talk
10. Give

10 things that I can improve on are...
1. Speaking more articulately
2. Being more kind
3. Being less judgmental
4. Communicating more effectively
5. Maintaining a schedule
6. Budgeting
7. Following Instructions
8. Humility
9. Being more loving
10. Follow through

10 things that I love about my family are...
1. Their love is unconditional
2. They pamper me
3. They let me pretend to be their princess.
4. They give me hugs and let me snuggle.
5. They are unique.
6. They provide wisdom and knowledge.
7. They can always make me laugh.
8. They offer never-ending support.
9. They have given me the gospel
10. They let me care and love them

10 beautiful things outside are...
1. Flowers
2. Birds
3. Animals
4. Waterfalls
5. Trees
6. Mountains
7. Ocean
8. Streams/lakes/ bodies of water
9. Sunsets/rises
10. Sky (clouds specifically)

10 good books that I have read are...
1. Book of Mormon
2. Believing Christ
3. Ishmael
4. The Power of Touch
5. For All Eternity
6. Twilight Series
7. Harry Potter Series
8. Scarlet Pimpernel
9. Hearts in Hiding
10. Mere Christianity

10 of my favorite movie stars are...
1. Doris Day
2. Julie Andrews
3. Andy Griffith
4. Rock Hudson (anyone notice a pattern)
5. Cary Grant
6. Sandra Bullock
7. Vin Diesel
8. Amanda Bynes
9. Channing Tatum
10. David Boreanaz

10 popular music groups/artists are...
1. Most things Broadway (Show Tunes)
2. Disney
3. Nickleback
4. Taylor Swift
5. Brad Paisley
6. Boys Like Girls
7. Daughtry
8. Seriously Evan
9. Katy Perry
10. Stephen Speaks

10 fun things to do are...
1. Write
2. Read
3. Be with those I love
4. Watch movies/T.V.
5. Play with my puppy
6. Read
7. Run
8. Wii Fit
9. Driving Around
10. Sleep

10 great daydreams are...
1. Snuggling
2. Flying around
3. Kissing Strangers
4. Succeeding at a goal
5. Having Superpowers
6. Hugging
7. Romantic Notions
8. Plans going my way
9. Eating yummy things
10. Entering peace

10 special people in my life are...
1. My Mom
2. My Dad
3. Braden
4. Zachary
5. Giselle
6. My other Self
7. Heather
8. Toni
9. My Grandpa
10. SUMCT Crisis Team

10 great movies are...
1. Scarlet Pimpernel (all of them)
2. She’s the Man
3. Pride & Prejudice
4. Blind Side
5. My Life in Ruins
6. Big Fat Greek Wedding
7. Anastasia
8. Emma Smith My Story
9. Almost any Disney Pixar
10. Practically any Disney

Happiness

For the first time in several months, I am genuinely happy. It's so great to find myself again. There are a few thorns--I wish that I had a social life, but I don't go get one.--But really I am busy with work and the EMT course I'm taking. It's so nice to be busy. I flourish under the stress--seriously I found it more stressful when I had every night free to myself. Life is good though. I love being happy. I can definitely tell that my worry and pain is being buffered. I'm very grateful for it. For my Heavenly Father and His help for me to see the good points in my life. The highs rather than the lows. I know that He helps me with that. It really seems like everytime I start to get down and go "oh, woe is me" I start to think how blessed I really am. And I am so grateful for that. It's hard to be depressed and unhappy when you are thinking about all the things that are blessings. It's wonderful.